Tuesday 31 December 2013

Day 4 - Rickshaw Rally - Thanjavur - Madurai

Day 4 and our little convoy has a long way to go - just over 200km.

MS T-shirts today plus the nuclear pants
  We are 3 km from the start when the Bumbling Bees have a problem - their clutch has gone.


Tiger to the rescue - clutch replacement in less than 30 minutes
Maybe, but John says it doesn't appear to work with women
Roadside cashew nuts - unfortunately the other teams have been through before us and the price has rocketed
Indian road etiquette demands constant horn, but otherwise there don't appear to be any restrictions on what and where you can park.  Stopping in the middle of the road is positively encouraged.

Bumbling Bees nip past
Other rickshaw drivers like to put us to the test
We're flagged down by a passing TV crew and asked to do some soundbites for a New Year show - we've no idea whether or not we made it to air but we gave it our best shot - 'GR TV - Super TV'

Now we're on the telly - GR TV - Super TV
Fort in the middle of nowhere - described by locals as mountain stronghold

We came across this fort in the middle of nowhere and stopped for a quick look.  The locals were somewhat surprised by our appearance as we stepped out from the rickshaws.

In the shadow of the mountain stronghold
Filling up - we make frequent stops to fill up the thirsty 7l tank
The last 26km into Madurai is on the equivalent of the M1 - our slow speed rickshaws spin in the backdraft of the trucks and buses that tear past us.  Our rickshaw is the thirstiest of our group and at times we get no more than 80km on a tank.  We're getting expert at buying the oil and petrol mix.

We make Madurai by the appointed time.  We did however have a small cheat - Phil asked a guy for directions and the chap jumped in and drove team 3 to the hotel - Bees and ourselves had to pursuit drive through the rush hour traffic dodging buses and scattering bikes so as not to lose him!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE or as they say in Tamil Nadu புத்தாண்டு

- and a day off for us tomorrow.



DAY 3 - Rickshaw Rally - Ponducherry - Thanjavur

Day 3 and Team 6 is back in the race - our mechanics have worked wonders and our rickshaw is ready and waiting having safely negotiated the night drive from Chennai.  Today we set off on the 177km trip to Thanjavur and I'm driving

Early morning and quiet road heading to Ponducherry beach and task 1
Our first task is to find the Gandhi statue at the beach - it's two minutes from the hotel and after a minor domestic, we arrive with all the others

All the rickshaws shining in the sun
The only people with clothes that outshine John's orange gear.
Back on the road, the Bumbling Bees and Team Slap (007) are on our tail
It's a fantastic sight as we drive serenely along, I say serenely but the noise generated in the rickshaw from the busy engine is loud especially if you are in the wrong gear (which we usually are).  All the locals are surprised to see a small blond driving past and the children get very excited as we pass by.


Our next stop is a refuge for street children who have been abandoned by their parents.  They look after boys up to the age of 20, giving them an education and helping them to find a job.  It's funded completely by donations and the Indian Round Table does a superb job, including funding the new kitchen.

Team Slap (Real name Rupert but he's a Royal Marine so ....) makes the boys' day by giving them a collection of cricket gear including bat, ball, pads, helmet etc - the lads are so excited I think they would like to take us on in a match right now.

They'll soon be ready to give England a game!
Lollipops, balloons and Scotland stickers work equally well with the youngsters
Back on the road we face up to a recurrent hazard.  At every town there's usually a group of traffic police watching proceedings.  We're travelling through the checkpoint when we get the 'pull over' sign - 'Us?' - 'You'  I jump out and ask if they want a photo with the rickshaw, and despite their superior telling the cops to check us out, they pose for a snap and then wave us on.

The Police have been extremely helpful and understanding
As previously reported we have to tackle many hazards but the number one no no is to avoid at all costs hitting a cow.  This is not always easy as the roads are narrow and some of these cows are very big
Mooooooove Over
We've formed a little convoy and together with team 3, Between Dreams and team 4, the Bumbling Bees we navigate our way.  Team 3 has Phil and Lorraine who are experienced drivers in foreign lands, team 4 with Be as driver and Ed the navigator (she's got satnav) cling to the tail of team 3 as if there lives depend on it and we bring up the rear as our rickshaw barely gets past 50km/hour


Lorraine, Be, Ed (her mum thinks she's on a beach holiday), and Me
With a straight downhill road and a tail wind we can coax almost 60 out of this little beauty but she drinks petrol like an alcoholic tramp drinks meths

We hit the magic 60!
We had to find this big temple as part of the challenge
We found the temple but the best bit was the roadside food and the chai - I bought lunch for six people for less than £1

Tasty nibbles at about 6p a piece

Team 6 arrive safe and sound in Thanjavur

Sunday 29 December 2013

Day 2 - Rickshaw Rally - Chennai to er Chennai

Things started well for team Adventure before Dementia who hit the starting line in Kilts and Glen Garries, grouse feathers wafting in the breeze.  Many of the other teams have also adopted this dressing up approach with one thing in common - we're all going to melt in the heat today as Chennai hits 29 degrees.

The Spam Fritters are dressed as monks, complete with bald pate wigs, Doggy Style and Dancing Tiger are all furred up but the prize for least appropriate costume goes to Monocom for their homage to Saville in a shiny bacofoil suit with matching rubber horse head masks.


Team Dancing Tiger and a H&S conscious John
Bumbling Bees and Mrs Doggy Style
We're waved off at 9:30 from Chennai and head for Puducherry - it's about 140km and should take about 4-5 hours.  Navigating Chennai's streets is a little difficult and we soon have a small convoy of four rickshaws - all heading the wrong way.

A recurring theme - stopping to share directions
We quickly realise our error and attempt a u turn at a busy junction.  We think we're in trouble when a traffic cop appears from nowhere and points out that this is an illegal manoeuvre.  We smile and he holds up the traffic whilst we all negotiate the turn

From here it should be plain sailing as it's a long straight road but trouble strikes us when our rickshaw loses all power and refuses to restart.  We push the vehicle to the kerb and check the fuel - there's none.

We attract a beggar's attention and he tries to help by offering to push - he doesn't speak English and we don't speak Hindu, but we quickly realise he has no idea where the next petrol station is.  Instead we flag down a rickshaw and the driver agrees to take me, and the beggar to a garage to get fuel whilst John guards the gear.  It's a long drive and I worry what I've let myself in for but the driver does a great job and after about 30 minutes we're back at the rickshaw filling her up from a lemonade bottle.

Helpful rickshaw driver and hapless beggar
We're gladdened when two of our fellow team mates appear in the form of the Bumbling Bees and Between Dreams with a further supply of fuel.  Unfortunately, fuel is the least of our worries and the rickshaw refuses to restart despite the best endeavours of our lovely rickshaw driver.  He even calls a couple of his mechanics but they tell us that it's more serious muttering 'the head gasket'

We're clearly going nowhere and with only 10km done we tell our team mates to press on whilst we call International Rescue.  It's 11am, it's hot, our phone stops working and we're in a pickle.



But our luck changes because we've broken down outside of a cheap hotel / restaurant which pulls out all the stops to help us, including providing refreshments, calling their own mechanics and letting us use their mobile phones to summon aid.

The scene of our breakdown - lucky for us the staff here were on hand to help
Guys - thanks for all your help
To cut a long story short without their help we'd have been stranded - as it was we wait until 3pm before our mechanics arrive and strip down the engine in the street.  Mechanic 'Tiger' is an absolute whizz

Tiger to the rescue


Unfortunately, by the time repairs are completed we won't be able to finish this leg of our journey in daylight so whilst an experienced driver takes our rickshaw, we complete the journey in an air con taxi.  We hope for a better performance tomorrow.

Saturday 28 December 2013

Day 1 - Rickshaw Rally - Chennai

Oh my god - an easy day's practice was an absolute roller coaster of a day.

We meet the other teams, there's 12 of us with a mix of Norwegians, Germans, Brits and a few antipodeans.  We had started bonding in the bar the previous night and it looks like there will be some heavy duty partying.

The teams are:

1. Spam Fritters
2. Team Doggy Style
3. Between dreams
4. The Bumbling Bees
5. Koala-ty-drivers
6. Adventure before dementia
7. Slap and the Troubadour (includes Royal Marine so no-one messes with Rupert)
8. Blondie and the Dude
9. Dancing Tiger - Nrtya Bagha
10. Inglorious Bembel Boys
11. Monocorn
12. Bavaria xpress

Spam fritters ia a rhyming slang apparently similar to the Gary Glitter - the standard has been set as the team's tuk tuk is decorated with brown turds



First stop - briefing and meet the press.  I'm immediately a target for the newspapers and the local tv - we look forward to seeing the rushes tomorrow but we'll be on our way by crack of dawn.



Afetr, we head over to meet up with our tuktuks - it's love at first sight as team ABD No 6 looks lovely in its orange paint job.

Isn't she a beauty
We have three hours practice and try to get used to these machines which are easy to drive but very temperamental - only one team manages to roll its tuktuk but it's a salutary lesson to us all.

And away we go
We practice starts, stops, hill starts but then find that we have to go and visit a school about 10km from the training ground and then drive back to the hotel.  Its about 35km - it takes almost 4 hours.

I volunteer to drive, John is map reading using a map we borrowed from the hotel and a torch - a blank piece of paper would have more detail than the map - we set off and three other teams assume we can drive and know where we're going - it's a big ask.

Stress levels to maximum as I set out on the road
More by luck than judgement we find the school but the trip back to the hotel in the dark is a sweaty, blistering (you should see my gear hand) torment through busy roads and accompanied by honking horns.  To be fair, the other road users, including the buses are incredibly tolerant but we are grateful to a group of Indians who tell us to follow them.

Safe at last. we head straight for the bar where John is taunted with the following sign - but although we're in Chennai and this is a typical "English Pub" there's only Kingfisher - it'll have to do.



We reach the hotel just in time for the welcome party and find that everyone is in the same boat.  We've survived day one!  After that, what the hell - I enter the hot chill eating contest - it's not the worst thing I've had to do today.


Guys, if you haven't donated yet please visit the first post - this is, without doubt the maddest thing I've ever done and I'd love to have your support on the trip that lies ahead.

Thursday 26 December 2013

J J J Jumping Jaipur

Another 300km brings us to Jaipur, the sprawling capital city of Rajasthan with more than 3 million people most of whom seem to be on the streets as we arrive.

We’re staying in a lovely homestay - not over-looking or even in a fort or palace but comfortable and friendly, and away from the bustle of the City.  Jaipur is a shock to our system after our previous stops in Rajasthan – it’s big and crazy, dusty and loud with traffic that leaves us speechless.  


The Amber Fort is the main attraction here and many tourists see no more of Rajasthan than a whistle-stop tour as part of the ‘Golden Triangle’ of Delhi, Jaipur and Agra.  


The fort is reached via a steep climb and most tourists fork out £10 to travel up on an elephant – we choose not to and drive up by the back route and enter through the Chand Pol, the Moon Gate. 


The majority of travellers are Indians and, as with all other places we’ve seen, the women  wear brightly coloured Saris and the men wear anything they like in a range of casual styles.  


However, the prize for ‘Wearing this gear for a bet’  has to go to a westerner – who scoops the award for fashion disaster.

Nice shoes too!
The hawkers are on us like flies and are amongst the pushiest we’ve encountered. With no regard for personal space, they thrust postcards, umbrellas and turbans under our noses and our subtle hints that we are not minded to purchase their assortment of tat are lost on them.  A more forceful approach only buys a short respite before they regroup and come again.


From the Amber fort we can see the city walls clinging to the surrounding mountain tops and meandering away into the distance, whilst above us the Jaigarh Fort stands an imposing guard.  


The fort is well maintained and picturesque but it’s busy and maybe we’ve reached fort overload as neither of us are wowed by our surroundings.  We stroll around fighting with our audio tour which requires immense pressure on the buttons to select the relative commentary and spend a couple of hours strolling around and admiring the views but taking nothing in of the history of the fort.

On our way to the City Palace we stop briefly to admire Jal Mahal, the red sandstone Lake Palace which, not surprisingly is in the middle of Man Sagar a large man-made lake.  Apparently the Lake Palace is in a poor state of repair and it isn’t accessible to the public.


Jantar Mantar provides an interesting diversion.  A seemingly bizarre set of modernistic sculptures, it is an observatory, and the sculptures are used to calculate the time of day and the movement of the stars and the planets.  


We have no real idea how this is done and the signs explaining their use are no more enlightening so we nod sagely and move on.


Jaipur’s City Palace is our last stop and it is heaving with people.  We make our way around and its elaborate and ornate. John loved the armoury which houses all manner of weapons from fearsome looking swords and daggers to huge guns carried by camel, all proudly displayed.  I just ‘people watch’ and note that signs saying ‘no photographs allowed’ and ‘no tipping the guards’ (who act as impromptu, uninvited and unintelligent guides), are merely a guideline and largely ignored.

A pair of big jugs
Tired and thirsty, we head to the Palace’s café.  We wait and wait but the waiters pointedly ignore us whilst serving the incoming Indians with speed.  Our subtle attempts to draw the attention of any waiter are useless and eventually we get up and leave wishing perhaps that the waiters would have paid us as much attention as the hawkers.

Travelling back to our homestay, the old ‘Pink City’ is fascinating.  The traffic clogs the roads, dirty town buses already crammed to capacity stop to disgorge passengers whilst crowds more try to clamber aboard.

Plenty of room on top
Cows and goats share the roads with rickshaws and camels and the street sellers do a brisk trade.  By local standards it’s a bit chilly so we see goats with coats, and more surprisingly a goat with a plaster-cast on its leg.

Goat with cast is in the middle
On one roundabout a number of families are living in tents made from all manner of salvaged materials, cooking over small fires with soot blackened pans and accompanied by their mainly bare children and a cow.  Opposite, there are gold merchants and retailers of precious stones and gems.  The rich and poor rub shoulders easily here but seem largely oblivious to each others presence.

After another tense visit to the armed ATM we head back and enjoy a home cooked meal with Nora and Marcelo from Switzerland.  They’re on the Golden Triangle but have travelled in Australia and South America and we enjoy swapping tales of our respective travels.  We’re astonished that they have never seen nor tried pappadams – there must be a marketing opportunity for an enterprising Indian living in Switzerland.

Nora and Marcelo - who paid our beer tab - thanks guys
With renewed gusto we set off the following day to visit some of the less popular sights and are rewarded with quiet, hawker free attractions. Jaigarh Fort overlooks and was used to house the army which protected the Amber Fort below. 


John is almost frog-marched through the display of weapons in the armoury by an overly enthusiastic but completely knowledgeless attendant who latches on to him and rattles off facts that can be read off the displays and occasional questions that are accompanied with ‘yes, yes, very good sir, yes yes –come come’ – it’s hard not to laugh and he seems satisfied with the 10 rupee tip paid for comic value only.

The views are superb 


but we are surprised at the hive of activity inside the fort. Hundreds of Indians are painting chairs, erecting stages and lighting, painting, sewing and generally running about. 


We sneek a peek at a thick, spiral bound project plan and discover that we are witnessing the preparations for a lavish wedding which will take place tomorrow when this massive fort is to be transformed into an fairytale palace. 2,500 invited guests are to attend and we let the workers get on – there’s a huge amount to do in a short space of time but in India, all things are possible.  If I were a guest I think that I’d check that the paint was dry before sitting down!

The Nahargarh or Tiger Fort is harder to reach and is a bit quieter and we can enjoy a stroll at our own pace. Restoration work is taking place and watching the women mix mortar before carrying on their heads to the men folk is a bit strange but watching the scaffolding being built 


and the use of bamboo ladders would send H&S wild.


After a superb lunch in a local restaurant we go to look at the block printing which is famous in this area.  We end up (as anticipated)being shown the most amazing carpets that look lovely but as we didn’t come to buy a carpet we admire but don’t engage.  Mohammed, the salesman who took our stance with good grace was extremely passionate about his carpets and we had to admit that the quality, particularly of the silk on silk creations was excellent. 


Curiosity got the better of me and I asked the price of a particularly stunning carpet.  2,800 English Rupees!  


I nearly choked and said that I would have to win the Clyde Lottery to afford it, and for that price I’d expect the carpet to be able to fly!